Blended Not Shaken Ministries and Publications

Christian step/single parent and blended families ministry.

Beauty Within

Last Saturday, the ministry hosted a half day seminar for single and step mums. The event was designed to fit the theme of ‘Beauty Within’ with the key scripture taken from 1 Peter 3:3-4.

Written in 60 A.D yet, like all scripture, it is as relevant today as when Peter penned the words.

The world emphasizes beauty and appearance above

anything else; in fact, it is a multi billion dollar industry. Many of us

(me included) spend far too much time,money and energy our outward appearance.The pursuit of outward beauty brings discontentment, ingratitude for how God has created us, is not lasting and can be costly. It can also rob us of your peace.

When Peter addressed the early church, he told them not to make their outward appearance a priority. Although it’s not a sin to want to look nice and look after yourself, human nature tends to love oneself too much. Peter was saying that it is far more beneficial to cultivate inner beauty- a gentle and quiet spirit.

The Greek word for ‘quiet’ means ‘tranquil and undisturbed’ or peaceful. It has nothing to do with personality types. An extroverted person can just as easily cultivate a gentle and quiet spirit and an introverted person could just as easily not possess one.

The Lord is interested in the heart of a person- our inner selves. Inner beauty is precious to God. It is unfading and fulfilling. It mirrors Jesus. It glorifies God. It draws others to Him so is of itself a good witness. Inner beauty (becoming more like Jesus) is God’s priority for us. He will allow anything or anyone into our lives to help in this life-long process.

When reading the passage of scripture that tells us how God guided the prophet Samuel to anoint His chosen as the next king, we get a good picture of the Lord’s heart on the matter of outward appearance. Samuel thought that Jesse’s first born son Eliab would surely be the one, judging by his looks and charisma. Yet God was quick to tell Samuel..

“Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see has man sees,for man looks at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

A peaceful person is a beautiful person. They are attractive and good to be around. As we know,peace is one of the fruit of the Holy Spirit.One of Jesus’ many names is the Prince of Peace.He offers us a peace that is not what the world offers. It is a peace that surpasses understanding.

One of my favourite scriptures is found in Isaiah 26:3 and says..

“You will keep him/her in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You because they trust You.”

So, a trust in the Lord results in peace.They go hand in hand.

In fact, inner beauty displays all nine of the fruit of the Holy Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control. Each of these need no restraint in our lives.

As we grow in our surrender and acceptance of His will in our lives, let go of negative emotions (that also cause ugliness), bad and ungodly habits and instead ‘put on’ the traits listed in passages like Colossians 3, we work in partnership with the Holy Spirit. Another term for this work is our progressive sanctification. This will cause my relationship with the Lord to deepen and mature and I will experience a serenity that is far better than the best fashion statement and youthful, beautiful appearance money can buy or time can afford.

The Bible tells us of our essential garments. These are SALVATION and RIGHTEOUSNESS. (See Isaiah 61:10)

Other pieces of clothing mentioned in scripture include STRENGTH and DIGNITY. (See Prov.31:25)

Strength is defined as ‘the power to resist strain’ and dignity presents a picture of calmness and poise. Think about how such beauty traits and biblical clothing might transform your everyday life….

Recently,I found in my first bible a handwritten poem called ‘Who’s the Fairest?’ The poet is unknown.

“Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who’s the fairest of all them all?
Not the girl with the hateful heart
Poison dart with the stinging dart
Fairest she, who shed forth love
Gentle thoughts from God above
Beauty blossoms in the face
When the heart is filled with grace.
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who’s the fairest of them all?
Not the unchaste, brazen maid
Prideful, flippant, unafraid
Fairest she, whose heart is pure
Manner modest, glance demure
Virtue crowns this girl a queen
For her life shines true and clean.
Mirror, mirror, tell me who
Can my countenance renew?
Jesus Christ, God’s righteous One
Altogether lovely one
Fairest of ten thousand, yes!
He can give you loveliness.

While on this earth, our ‘new creation’ is not complete. Yet we are guaranteed in scripture that “when we see Him, we will be like Him.”

In the waiting for Jesus return, we can learn to see ourselves in God’s mirror-by looking in His Word.

In the Bible, God tells me I am:

BEAUTIFUL (Song of Songs 4:7)
A DELIGHT (Psalm 147:11)
HIS BRIDE (Isaiah 62:5)
A REASON TO REJOICE (Zeph. 3:17)
PRECIOUS, HONOURED, LOVED (Isaiah 43:1)
LAVISHED IN LOVE (1 John 3:11)

These are but a few. I would encourage you to meditate on these scriptures and indeed look for others that tell you WHO you are in Him. I can guarantee you will NOT find such love and satisfaction in anything the world offers.

Let us rejoice in the fact that our Lord sees us in His marvelous mirror as precious, treasured and beautiful. When we know we are loved,we can trust the One who loves us. We can ask Him to reveal aspects of His sanctifying work in us to increase our hope that we will be perfect when Jesus returns… Amen.

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TESTIMONIALS

What people say?

My Two Houses was one of my favourite books as a younger person. It helped me understand how I was feeling about having two homes. I feel as though Karina’s books have simplified a confusing situation, in a way for all ages to understand.

Charlotte

There is affirmation and encouragement to single dads and mums through “Let’s shout out to single dads” and “Sing a song to single mums”, anchoring their value, peace and endurance in the Word of God.

Librarian

Clear, fun explanations in “My family bush” of hard to decipher terms like half-brother and half-sister, full brother or sister, step-parent and how they connect to the relationships within a family.  Relating that to Jesus’ own family could be a revelation to children that their own family structure is not so different after all, that families who love and care for each other are part of God’s plan, no matter how they are made up.

Librarian

One step at a time: a step family journal“ is an honest, humorous yet life and faith affirming read for those approaching and in middle years. The use of illustrations in the text make it appealing and engaging.

Librarian

Karina’s books are very helpful when you struggle to relate to a child of separated or divorced parents when you haven’t experienced this yourself. I have quietly read or given time for a child to read one of the books and then wait for their responses. I find Karina’s books extremely helpful in my ministry to children.

Chaplain

I am often in awe of God’s amazing timing! My morning began with feelings of despair over a family relationship that had broken down. I poured out my heart to the Lord, seeking His comfort and guidance. A short time later there was a knock on my door and the postie handed me a package. It was Karina’s book “Sing a Song to Single Mums”. As I read, I came across a page that spoke directly to my situation!

Even down to the illustration! My day ended with renewed hope in God’s promise that He works all things… good things and bad things… together, for the good of those who love Him. I am so thankful to Karina for writing such a beautiful book and for the Lord’s timing in delivering it into my hands precisely when I needed to read it!

Single Mum

Caught in the Middle is one of my favourite books because, whenever I read it, I feel close to God.

River

I read My Two Houses with my entire Year 5 class. They loved it! It began a wonderful conversation which allowed many students to be vulnerable enough to be open about their feelings and situations at home as well as to a better understanding of what some of their classmates go through with divorced parents.

Primary Teacher

I have used My Two Houses with a 13-year boy during one of my sessions with him. He loved that he could relate so well with the book, stating, “That’s just like me” and I could see a change in his demeanour and body language in his knowing that there are other kids out there, just like him.

School Counselor

As a nuclear family, we love that the books contain so much scripture in teaching our children God’s word.

Ces, Father of 5, Pastor

Karina’s books give children permission to have their feelings validated and provide comfort and healing to their souls.

Tania

When it comes to blending 2 families together or doing it by yourself there are a number of unique issues.  If you find yourself in a role as a single parent, stepparent or trying to help siblings navigate their new situation it can be very tough.   

We at Focus on the Family Australia, want to help relationships and families  be as healthy as they can be.  We know it is not an easy task unifying 2 families or doing it solo.  

We highly recommend Blended Not Shaken Ministries to help provide some tools to cultivate a loving, blended or single parent home to achieve a sense of unity in your new family. 

Brett Ryan, CEO Focus on the Family Australia